Tag Archives: love

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Men on the Path, November 4, 2009: True Success

We were in session #3 from a quiet strength a men’s Bible study by Tony Dungy and our question for today is: How is God’s definition of success different from how most people define it?
We looked at five key verses: Psalm 1:1-3; one Samuel 16:7; Micah 6: 6-8; Matthew 22:34-40; acts 1:8; Philippians 1: 21

God’s definition of success is “to live is Christ to die is gain” only when we can die to ourselves can we truly be successful. J. C. Ryle in his book titled Holiness points out what it costs to be a true Christian (to gain true success).

“For one thing, it will cost us our self righteousness. We must cast away all pride and high thoughts and conceit of our own goodness… for another thing it will cost us our sins. We must be willing to give up every habit and practice which is wrong in God’s sight. We and our sin must quarrel, if we and God are to be friends….For another thing, it will cost us our love of ease…we secretly wish we could have a vicarious Christianity, and could be good by proxy, and have everything done for us. Anything that requires exertion and labor is entirely against the grain of our hearts… in the last place, it will cost us the favor of the world… surely a Christian should be willing to give up anything which stands between him and heaven…A religion that costs nothing is worth nothing! A cheap Christianity, without a cross, will prove in the end a useless Christianity, without a crown…”-pg 82-86

“We must seek to have personal intimacy with the Lord Jesus, and to deal with him as a man deals with a loving friend. We must realize what it is to turn to him first in every need, to talk to him about every difficulty, to consult him about every step, to spread before him all our sorrows, to get him to share in our all our joys, to do all as in his site, and to go through every day leaning on and looking to him.”-pg 113

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Married Life Live!

Welcome Back! We are starting up MLL again.

The format for MLL is fun, informal, and interactive. We will eat together, and talk about how we can have better intimacy and great marriages.

Friday, October 23 from 6-9pm (Dinner and childcare provided)
6-7pm Family Dinner
7-9pm Marriage Seminar

TOPIC: “A Healthy Marriage”
Guest Speaker: Lana Bateman, Chaplin to Women of Faith & President of Phlippians Ministry

Location: Hicks Canyon Elementary School, New Multipurpose Room (3817 Viewpark, Irvine, CA 92602)

Sign-up or for more information please let us know. You can email us at uberlumen@uberlumen.com or call 949-400-5216

View Hicks Canyon Elementary School in a larger map

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Piercing the veil to our hearts

I love to read, but so often, I read and read and read but nothing sinks in, nothing stills my heart, nothing pierces soul.  Last night these words pierced my veil.  If only I was willing to allow God to tear down my veil how free, how joy filled, how wonderful marriage, friendship, fatherhood CAN be if we allow Him in….if we allow our wife and our closest friend(s) in to see our true heart and soul.
“What but the presence of a veil in our hearts? a veil not taken away as the first veil was, but which remains there still shutting out the light and hiding the face of God from us. It is the veil of our fleshly fallen nature living on, unjudged within us, uncrucified and unrepudiated. It is the close-woven veil of the self-life which we have never truly acknowledged, of which we have been secretly ashamed, and which for these reasons we have never brought to the judgment of the cross. It is not too mysterious, this opaque veil, nor is it hard to identify. We have but to look in our own hearts and we shall see it there, sewn and patched and repaired it may be, but there nevertheless, an enemy to our lives and an effective block to our spiritual progress.

Self is the opaque veil that hides the Face of God from us. It can be removed only in spiritual experience, never by mere instruction…There must be a work of God in destruction before we are free. We must invite the cross to do its deadly work within us. We must bring our self-sins to the cross for judgment. We must prepare ourselves for an ordeal of suffering in some measure like that through which our Saviour passed when He suffered…

Let us remember: when we talk of the rending of the veil we are speaking in a figure, and the thought of it is poetical, almost pleasant; but in actuality there is nothing pleasant about it. In human experience that veil is made of living spiritual tissue; it is composed of the sentient, quivering stuff of which our whole beings consist, and to touch it is to touch us where we feel pain. To tear it away is to injure us, to hurt us and make us bleed. To say otherwise is to make the cross no cross and death no death at all. It is never fun to die. To rip through the dear and tender stuff of which life is made can never be anything but deeply painful. Yet that is what the cross did to Jesus and it is what the cross would do to every man to set him free. Let us beware of tinkering with our inner life in hope ourselves to rend the veil. God must do everything for us. Our part is to yield and trust. We must confess, forsake, repudiate the self-life, and then reckon it crucified.

There comes a moment when its work is finished and the suffering victim dies. After that is resurrection glory and power, and the pain is forgotten for joy that the veil is taken away and we have entered in actual spiritual experience the Presence of the living God.

Lord, how excellent are Thy ways, and how devious and dark are the ways of man. Show us how to die, that we may rise again to newness of life. Rend the veil of our self-life from the top down as Thou didst rend the veil of the Temple. We would draw near in full assurance of faith.”–Pursuit of God by Tozer

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The GREAT Adventure, Part 3: Your Story

What is your story? Join us in this 3rd part of 4 sermons on God’s love and grace.

There is a great website that walks you through the process of creating your story to share: www.5clicks.com

THE UNEXPECTED ADVENTURE

Taking everyday risks to extend the grace of God

THE HOPE THAT IS WITHIN US

15But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect-1Peter 3:15

WE ALL HAVE A STORY TO SHARE

-Our friends are interested

-Our friends can relate

-It is hard to argue with

PAUL’S GRACE STORY-ACTS 26

9“I too was convinced that I ought to do all that was possible to oppose the name of Jesus of Nazareth…On the authority of the chief priests I put many of the saints in prison, and when they were put to death, I cast my vote against them. 11Many a time I went from one synagogue to another to have them punished, and I tried to force them to blaspheme. In my obsession against them, I even went to foreign cities to persecute them. 12“On one of these journeys I was going to Damascus with the authority and commission of the chief priests. 13About noon, O king, as I was on the road, I saw a light from heaven, brighter than the sun, blazing around me and my companions. 14We all fell to the ground, and I heard a voice saying to me in Aramaic, ‘Saul, Saul, why do you persecute me? It is hard for you to kick against the goads.’ 15“Then I asked, ‘Who are you, Lord?’ ” ‘I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting,’ the Lord replied. 16‘Now get up and stand on your feet. I have appeared to you to appoint you as a servant and as a witness of what you have seen of me and what I will show you. 17I will rescue you from your own people and from the Gentiles. I am sending you to them 18to open their eyes and turn them from darkness to light, and from the power of Satan to God, so that they may receive forgiveness of sins and a place among those who are sanctified by faith in me.’ 19“So then, King Agrippa, I was not disobedient to the vision from heaven. 20First to those in Damascus, then to those in Jerusalem and in all Judea, and to the Gentiles also, I preached that they should repent and turn to God and prove their repentance by their deeds. 21That is why the Jews seized me in the temple courts and tried to kill me. 22But I have had God’s help to this very day, and so I stand here and testify to small and great alike. I am saying nothing beyond what the prophets and Moses said would happen— 23that the Christ would suffer and, as the first to rise from the dead, would proclaim light to his own people and to the Gentiles.”

_________–vv. 9-11

_________-vv. 12-18

_________-vv. 19-23

STORY TIPS

Theme

-The central issue in our lives that shows the_______ in our spiritual outlook before and after knowing Christ.

Middle Handle

-we need to keep it simple, clear, and __________

Conclusion

-End with a question that requires a ____________

Scripture

-Think of one key verse that relates to your story.

Language

-avoid religious clichés and insider language

Length

-Be_________ and to the point

Put others first

-keep focus on your friend

-Emphasize those aspects of your story that will relate

PRAY FOR AN OPEN DOOR

And pray for us, too, that God may open a door for our message, so that we may proclaim the mystery of Christ, for which I am in chains.-col. 4:3


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The GREAT Adventure, Part 4: The Bridges

This is the 4th and final part of our sermon series on grace, love, and God.

THE UNEXPECTED ADVENTURE

Taking everyday risks to extend the grace of God

HELPING SPIRITUAL EXPLORES FIND THE GRACE OF GOD

So we are Christ’s ambassadors; God is making his appeal through us. We speak for Christ when we plead, “Come back to God!” -2 Cor. 5:20

REMEMBER THIS IS A ___________ AND NOT AN EVENT

What, after all, is Apollos? And what is Paul? Only servants, through whom you came to believe—as the Lord has assigned to each his task. 6I planted the seed, Apollos watered it, but God made it grow. 7So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God, who makes things grow. 8The man who plants and the man who waters have one purpose, and each will be rewarded according to his own labor. 9For we are God’s fellow workers; you are God’s field-1Corinthians 3:5-9

-Process oriented

-Team based

-Spirit driven

BRIDGE ONE: __________ RELATIONSHIPS

As apostles of Christ we could have been a burden to you, 7but we were gentle among you, like a mother caring for her little children. 8We loved you so much that we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as well, because you had become so dear to us. 9Surely you remember, brothers, our toil and hardship; we worked night and day in order not to be a burden to anyone while we preached the gospel of God to you. 10You are witnesses, and so is God, of how holy, righteous and blameless we were among you who believed. 11For you know that we dealt with each of you as a father deals with his own children encouraging, comforting and urging you to live lives worthy of God, who calls you into his kingdom and glory. -1 Thessalonians 2:7-12

-Genuine

-Grace filled

-Authentic

BRIDGE TWO-THE ______________

1Now, brothers, I want to remind you of the gospel I preached to you, which you received and on which you have taken your stand. 2By this gospel you are saved, if you hold firmly to the word I preached to you…… 3For what I received I passed on to you as of first importance: that Christ died for our sins according to the Scriptures, 4that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day according to the Scriptures,–1Cor. 15:1-3

The bridge illustration

THE UNEXPECTED ADVENTURE

3And pray for us, too, that God may open a door for our message, so that we may proclaim the mystery of Christ, for which I am in chains. 4Pray that I may proclaim it clearly, as I should. Be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity. 6Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.-Col. 4:3-6

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Contempt is the key to a BAD Marriage

I was reminded of some powerful marriage tips and principles from one of John Gottman’s great marriage books when Gottman’s research was brought up in Blink by Malcolm Gladwell.

Gladwell points out that Gottman has done detailed, objective research to find traits that can sink any marriage.  The primary trait that will ruin a marriage? CONTEMPT.

“Four Horsemen: defensiveness, stonewalling, criticism, and contempt. Even within the Four Horsemen, in fact, there is one emotion that he considers the most important of all: contempt. If Gottman observes one or both partners in a marriage showing contempt toward the other, he considers it the single most important sign that the marriage is in trouble.
“It’s trying to put that person on a lower plane than you. It’s hierarchical.” Gottman has found, in fact, that the presence of contempt in a marriage can even predict such things as how many colds a husband or a wife gets; in other words, having someone you love express contempt toward you is so stressful that it begins to affect the functioning of your immune system. “Contempt is closely related to disgust, and what disgust and contempt are about is completely rejecting and excluding someone from the community.”
“The big gender difference with negative emotions is that women are more critical, and men are more likely to stonewall. We find that women start talking about a problem, the men get irritated and turn away, and the women get more critical, and it becomes a circle. But there isn’t any gender difference when it comes to contempt. Not at all.” Contempt is special. If you can measure contempt, then all of a sudden you don’t need to know every detail of the couple’s relationship.”–excerpt from Gladwell’s book
My marriage was in trouble, and I didn’t even know it.  I specialized in contempt.  It has been a slow process, and my wife remembers when I was filled with contempt, but we both look back amazed at how contempt has been eliminated from our marriage for many years now.  How?
  • HUMILITY through serving her, putting her ahead of yourself, learning to love her the way that she needs to be loved
  • BROKENNESS–being willing to acknowledge your own faults and inadequacies helps to break the contempt cycle
  • CONFESSION–share with her your brokenness, be volunerable with her, allow her to see the real you–flaws and all.
  • working at making our marriage better
  • being WILLING to change and serve your spouse
  • dating other men–deep, meaningful relationships with a few men has helped me to be a better husband (and person)
  • spending time in the appreciation room (see Love Dare book for details)–leaning and training myself to look at and appreciate her for all her beauty and for who she is–being grateful for her.
  • walking with Christ–prayer, Bible study, learning more and more about His love, humility, service, sacrifice

There is more to follow….

Marriage is an adventure and a journey not a destination, and just like when you said I do to her and to Christ, it is just the beginning–the relationship (sanctification) is the adventure.

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The GREAT Adventure, Part 2: God’s Story

This is the 2nd of 4 parts to a sermon series about grace, adventure, and God’s love. Enjoy!

The Gospel Message

The Unexpected Adventure

Pastor Bucky Dennis

“For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek. 17 For in it the righteousness of God is revealed from faith for faith, as it is written, “The righteous shall live by faith.” 18 For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who by their unrighteousness suppress the truth.” Romans 1:16-18

  1. _________________________

  1. God is _________

“…God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in god, and God in him.” 1 John 4:16b

  1. God is _________ (absolutely pure)

“But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do; for it is written: ‘Be holy, because I am holy.’” 1 Peter 1:16

  1. God is _________ (a good judge)

“God is just: He will pay back trouble to those who trouble you.” 2 Thessalonians 1:16

  1. _________________________

  1. We were created good, but became _________.

“For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” Romans 3:23

  1. We deserve _________ (physical & spiritual)

“For the wages of sin is death…”Romans 6:23; Hebrews 9:22

  1. We are spiritually _________ (“morally bankrupt”)

“All of us have become like one who is unclean, and all our righteous acts are like filthy rags…” Isaiah 64:6; Ephesians 2:8-9

The Gospel Message

The Unexpected Adventure

Pastor Bucky Dennis

“For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek. 17 For in it the righteousness of God is revealed from faith for faith, as it is written, “The righteous shall live by faith.” 18 For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who by their unrighteousness suppress the truth.” Romans 1:16-18

  1. _________________________

  1. God is _________

“…God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in god, and God in him.” 1 John 4:16b

  1. God is _________ (absolutely pure)

“But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do; for it is written: ‘Be holy, because I am holy.’” 1 Peter 1:16

  1. God is _________ (a good judge)

“God is just: He will pay back trouble to those who trouble you.” 2 Thessalonians 1:16

  1. _________________________

  1. We were created good, but became _________.

“For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” Romans 3:23

  1. We deserve _________ (physical & spiritual)

“For the wages of sin is death…”Romans 6:23; Hebrews 9:22

  1. We are spiritually _________ (“morally bankrupt”)

“All of us have become like one who is unclean, and all our righteous acts are like filthy rags…” Isaiah 64:6; Ephesians 2:8-9

  1. _________________________

    1. Christ is _________, who also became man.

“In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God… The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the One and Only, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.” John 1:1, 14; John 8:24

    1. Christ died as our _________.

“He himself bore our signs in his body on the tree, so that we might die to sins and life for righteousness; by his wounds you have been healed.” 1 Peter 2:24; 1 Peter 3:18; 2 Corinthians 5:21

    1. Christ offers us salvation as a _________.

“For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast.” Ephesians 2:8-9; Romans 6:23

  1. _________________________

    1. You and I must _________.

“Yet to all who received him, to those who believe in his name, he gave the right to become children of God.” John 1:12

    1. We must trust Christ to be our _________

and _________.

“…because, if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.” Romans 10:9

    1. The result is a spiritual _________ by the Holy Spirit.

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!” 2 Corinthians 5:17; 1 Corinthians 6:19-20

  1. _________________________

    1. Christ is _________, who also became man.

“In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God… The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the One and Only, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.” John 1:1, 14; John 8:24

    1. Christ died as our _________.

“He himself bore our signs in his body on the tree, so that we might die to sins and life for righteousness; by his wounds you have been healed.” 1 Peter 2:24; 1 Peter 3:18; 2 Corinthians 5:21

    1. Christ offers His forgiveness as a _________.

“For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast.” Ephesians 2:8-9; Romans 6:23

  1. _________________________

    1. You and I must _________.

“Yet to all who received him, to those who believe in his name, he gave the right to become children of God.” John 1:12

    1. We must trust Christ to be our _________

and _________.

“…because, if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.” Romans 10:9

    1. The result is a spiritual _________ by the Holy Spirit.

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!” 2 Corinthians 5:17; 1 Corinthians 6:19-20

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The Mercy of God in the Old Testament

I continue to search for brief articles pointing out the true God of the O.T.  A friend and fellow physician who has an AMAZING website has a GREAT article summarizing key points: 1. God of O.T. is merciful; 2. God of O.T. NEVER killed innocent people 3. God of O.T. ALWAYS asked/pleaded with people to repent.

I have also cut and pasted it for you here:

The Mercy of God as Found in the Old Testament
by Rich Deem

Introduction

Jonah and God’s Mercy

Most Christians know Jonah as the reluctant prophet who was swallowed by a whale in order for God to convince him to go to Nineveh. Atheists often get caught up in the whale part of the story, not realizing that the story reveals that the ancients believed that God was merciful, although, at time, they often wished He hadn’t been.

Rich Deem

According to Richard Dawkins, Yahweh, the God of the Bible, is “jealous and proud of it; a petty, unjust, unforgiving control-freak; a vindictive, bloodthirsty ethnic cleanser; a misogynistic, homophobic, racist, infanticidal, genocidal, filicidal, pestilential, megalomaniacal, sadomasochistic, capriciously malevolent bully.”1 Absent from any of Dawkins’ description of God is His mercy. People tend to think of the God of the Old Testament as cruel and unforgiving, whereas the God of the New Testament is seen as the God of mercy, who sent Jesus to atone for the sins of the world. The Old Testament prophets were always warning the people about the wrath of God should they stray from the path of righteousness. However, what is usually ignored by atheists is God’s mercy for those who did repent of doing evil. Yes, God judged many people groups, but not before warning them.

Jonah and God’s mercy?

For those of you who only remember the whale part of Jonah’s story, here is a brief synopsis to get you a better background about Jonah. God called Jonah to travel to the city of Nineveh to warn them about their impending judgment, because of their wickedness.2 Jonah had different ideas, and attempted to flee from God by paying for passage on a foreign ship.3 However, God was not amused and sent a violent storm.4 The sailors were terrified and eventually figured out that Jonah was the cause of their endangerment, which he eventually admitted to them.5 Jonah was thrown overboard and God directed a great fish (or whale – the Hebrew is not that specific) to swallow Jonah and take him to the shore.6 Once expelled from the whale, Jonah decided to do what God had originally requested and travelled to Nineveh to preach repentance from their evil.7

A number of Christians assume Jonah was reluctant to go to Nineveh because they were known for their cruelty, and he feared for his life. However, the account gives a different reason why Jonah did not want to go. Jonah actually wanted God to judge the city of Nineveh and kill all their inhabitants. He was disappointed that the king and the people repented of their evil and were spared from God’s judgment.8 In fact, Jonah was so angry with God that he asked God to kill him.9 After that conversation, Jonah left the city and sat outside of it hoping that God would still destroy the city.10 God caused a plant to grow overnight to give Jonah shade during his watch, but then caused the death of the plant the next day. Jonah was furious about the plant.11 God pointed out that Jonah’s priorities were completely messed up, since he was more concerned about a plant that gave him shade than the fate of 120,000 souls in Nineveh:

Then the LORD said, “You had compassion on the plant for which you did not work and which you did not cause to grow, which came up overnight and perished overnight. Should I not have compassion on Nineveh, the great city in which there are more than 120,000 persons who do not know the difference between their right and left hand, as well as many animals?” (Jonah 4:10-11)

So, it was clear to Jonah that God was merciful and He would reconsider His judgment of evil if the people repented.12 Since Jonah wanted no part in God’s mercy, he tried to avoid following God’s instructions to warn the people.

Did God warn others?

Atheists would like you to believe that the God of the Old Testament just randomly killed people for no good reason and without warning. It turns out that atheists often don’t present the entire stories about God’s judgment. For example, in the greatest story of judgment, God sent a flood to kill all humanity except Noah and his family. However, Noah preached to the people of the coming judgment during the 100 years he was building the ark.13 In another famous example, God destroyed the cites of Sodom and Gomorrah, because of their evil. In fact, all the men of Sodom (including both young and old) attempted to rape the two angels who came to warn Lot of the impending judgment.14 Although warned,15 the men attempted to harm Lot, but were prevented when the angels caused them all to become blind.16 In many lesser known stories, God warned the people prior to executing judgment. Some of these warnings were heeded17 and others not,18 with the expected consequences. God’s own people were often recipients of God’s judgment, when they refused to heed His warnings.19 Here is a short list from the writings of the prophets:

Prophet Warning to Result
Isaiah Judah Judgment
Jeremiah Judah Judgment
Lamentations Jerusalem Judgment
Ezekiel Jerusalem, Tyre, Egypt Captivity in Babylon
Hosea Israel Judgment
Joel Tyre, Sidon, Philistia Judgment
Amos Israel Judgment
Obadiah Edom Judgment
Jonah Nineveh Repentance
Micah Israel Judgment
Nahum Nineveh Judgment
Habakkuk Judah Judgment
Zephaniah Judah Judgment
Zechariah Tyre, and other cities Judgment

It is a well known principle that God regularly warned people of impending judgment and He personally indicated that He would relent if they changed their ways.12 So, the atheists’ idea that God killed people without warning is false.

Does God kill the innocent?

Did God kill any innocent people along with the evil ones? In the two most famous examples of God’s judgment discussed above, the text clearly says that all the people God killed were evil.20 When God was about to destroy the cities of Sodom and Gomorrah, Abraham asked God if He would destroy the cities if there were 50 righteous people in them.21 God said no. Then Abraham asked the same question if there were 45 righteous people. Every time he dropped the number and got the same answer. The fact is that God would not have destroyed those cities if there were any righteous people in them. The few righteous who were in those cities He warned ahead of time to get out.22 In another example, Abimelech, king of Gerar, took Abraham’s wife because he lied saying that she was his sister.23 However, God prevented Abimelech from sleeping with her and warned him in a dream. Abimelech heeded God’s warning and was spared from death.23 Eliphaz the Temanite, in his discussions with Job, acknowledged that God did not judge the innocent with the guilty, but that those who act sinfully will incur God’s judgment.24 So, God does not destroy the righteous along with the evil.

Conclusion Top of page

In numerous instances, atheists cite the Old Testament for examples of where God killed “innocent” people. However, the texts show that the innocent are not judged, but only the guilty. In addition, virtually always, the guilty individuals were warned ahead of time about their sin. Jonah is often known as the reluctant prophet, although the reason for his hesitation was not due to the cruelty of Nineveh, but because he feared its people might repent and God might spare them. Jonah wanted God to kill all the people of Nineveh, but feared His mercy. So, Christians are not the only people who often seem to want to see God judge people for their evil, rather than praying for their reconciliation with God. Jonah reveals that God was known for His mercy even in Old Testament times. Even though God is merciful, His mercy extends only to those who heed His words of warning. There is no toleration for evil in God’s kingdom, so those who insist on testing God’s resolve toward sin will find themselves judged, and incarcerated in God’s jail.


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The GREAT adventure, Part 1: Grace & Love

Enjoy this teaching time about God’s amazing grace and love for us.  Here is the outline:

THE UNEXPECTED ADVENTURE

Taking everyday risks to extend the grace of God

AMBUSHED BY GRACE

4But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, 5made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved. 6And God raised us up with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms in Christ Jesus, 7in order that in the coming ages he might show the incomparable riches of his grace, expressed in his kindness to us in Christ Jesus. 8For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— 9not by works, so that no one can boast. 10For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.-Eph. 2:4-9

FALLING INTO THE HEART OF GOD-Luke 15

Now the tax collectors and “sinners” were all gathering around to hear him. 2But the Pharisees and the teachers of the law muttered, “This man welcomes sinners and eats with them.”-Luke 15:1

People matter to God

–the loss of connection

-a heart that seeks and finds

–the celebration of heaven

“But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him. 21“The son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.’ 22“But the father said to his servants, ‘Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. 23Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let’s have a feast and celebrate. 24For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’ So they began to celebrate. –Luke 15:

HELPING SPIRITUAL EXPLORERS FIND THE GRACE OF GOD

-Lead with love

Dear children, let’s not merely say that we love each other; let us show the truth by our actions.-1 John 3:18

–live an authentic faith

“You are the salt of the earth. But what good is salt if it has lost its flavor? Can you make it salty again? It will be thrown out and trampled underfoot as worthless.14 “You are the light of the world—like a city on a hilltop that cannot be hidden. 15 No one lights a lamp and then puts it under a basket. Instead, a lamp is placed on a stand, where it gives light to everyone in the house. 16 In the same way, let your good deeds shine out for all to see, so that everyone will praise your heavenly Father.–Matt. 5:13-16

-pray for opportunities

3And pray for us, too, that God may open a door for our message, so that we may proclaim the mystery of Christ, for which I am in chains.-col. 4:3

–take every day risks for God

5Be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity. 6Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.-Col. 4:5-6

20 So we are Christ’s ambassadors; God is making his appeal through us. We speak for Christ when we plead, “Come back to God!” -2 Cor. 5:20

PRAYING FOR OPPORTUNITIES TO EXTEND  GOD’S GRACE


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Judge NOT & love and understand as Jesus would (Matthew 7:1)

As I write this I am STILL recovering from the tongue lashing that I got from a patients wife yesterday.  We were having a congenial discussion about her spouse (the patient), and as I prepared to write orders and discuss the possible diagnoses, she went OFF.  I mentioned that his chronic abdominal cramps may, in the end (IF all the tests continue to come back negative) be entirely from stress.  Well she did NOT like that option at ALL.  “Don’t tell me it is stress! It is NOT stress! I KNOW it is not stress.  There is something wrong with him. That is what the other doctors said….”  She proceeded to sware at me for a good solid 2 minutes which seemed like a lifetime.  I was so frustrated and mad! I just finished a great book on how to be a better doctor, and I continue to try and improve my doctor skills.  In the book that I had just read, the author spoke about what a disservice doctors have done by just ordering more and more tests without getting at the heart of the matter and just talking with the patient.  It is SO frustrating to try to spend the time and show compassion and try and educate the patient to get spit in the face for it.  When you see over and over again that the patient is NOT interested in hearing what you have to say then you become hardened and numb and just give them what they want even if it is not necessary or the best treatment option!

After this very stressful situation, I found from the patients primary doctor that his wife has ‘gone off’ on him many times in the past, but that she is a professing Christian.  Now I was even more frustrated and angry.  I SO wanted to go back in to tell her how angry I am at her behavior.  How dare she act like that and claim to worship my precious Savior.

Now this is where the healing, the importance of fellowship, and the lessons were learned comes in.  I talked it over with one of my colleagues who is a believer.  And he challenged me to not judge her in that way.  OUCH!

He said: 1. just think how tough she would be without Christ and most importantly 2. you have never acted that way??? really never??? we are ALL like this at some time in our lives.  You MUST consider HER situation.  She is frustrated; she is scared; she has been dealing with this without any answers for months….WOW!

Now a day later, I see that God was teaching me a powerful review lesson on forgiveness, understanding, judgment, compassion, love, AND that I MUST continue to strive to love and go against the grain–and communicate with my patients with MORE compassion and understanding!

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How simple is the Christian walk of faith?

Here is a marvelous quote from 2 Christian missionaries who live in Africa about the Christian walk.

“Loving God with all your heart, mind, soul and strength will take you to the end of yourself, and you will find yourself looking out over a precipice. Only God can keep you from falling. Only faith working through love counts. Let’s never leave the simplicity and purity of devotion to Jesus. All we know when the pressure becomes great is Jesus and Him crucified. We exist by the power of the Cross, safe and secure.”-Rolland and Heidi

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Kingdom Living: Listen & Look for God moments

In Mike Erre’s newest book: Death by Church, he has an important chapter titled: Postures of Incarnation.  We need to show the world the incarnation through out actions.  We need to prayerfully watch and listen for the God moments–those moments every day where God is nudging us to show his love to others.

“I used to hate interuptions to my ministry until I understood that interruptions were my ministry.”-Henri Nouwen

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Sex, Marriage, Intimacy and Screwtape Letters: chapters 18-19

Key Scriptures:
Genesis 2:25, Ephesians 5:25, 1 John 4:18
Key Teaching points:
Sex is a spiritual discipline
Brokenness
Confession
Cross
Key Quote:
“Submit to my wife’s version of intimacy.”
Key Quotes from The Love Dare:
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The Love Dare (Alex Kendrick)
– Highlight Loc. 42-46 | Added on Sunday, May 24, 2009, 07:03 AM

The Love Dare journey is not a process of trying to change your spouse to be the person you want them to be. You’ve no doubt already discovered that efforts to change your husband or wife have ended in failure and frustration. Rather, this is a journey of exploring and demonstrating genuine love, even when your desire is dry and your motives are low. The truth is, love is a decision and not just a feeling. It is selfless, sacrificial, and transformational. And when love is truly demonstrated as it was intended, your relationship is more likely to change for the better.
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The Love Dare (Alex Kendrick)
– Highlight Loc. 930-35 | Added on Sunday, May 24, 2009, 07:10 AM

Yet this great blessing is also the site of its greatest danger. Someone who knows us this intimately can either love us at depths we never imagined, or can wound us in ways we may never fully recover from. It’s both the fire and the fear of marriage. Which of these are you experiencing the most in your home right now? Are the secrets your spouse knows about you reasons for shame, or reasons for drawing you closer? If your spouse were to answer this same question, would they say you make them feel safe, or scared? If home is not considered a place of safety, you will both be tempted to seek it somewhere else.
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The Love Dare (Alex Kendrick)
– Highlight Loc. 938-47 | Added on Sunday, May 24, 2009, 07:12 AM

The Bible says, “There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear” (1 John 4:18). The atmosphere in your marriage should be one of freedom. Like Adam and Eve in the garden, your closeness should only intensify your intimacy. Being “naked” and “not ashamed” (Genesis 2:25) should exist in the same sentence, right in your marriage?physically and emotionally. Admittedly, this is tender territory. Marriage has unloaded another person’s baggage into your life, and yours into theirs. Both of you have reason to feel embarrassed that this much has been revealed about you to another living soul. But this is your opportunity to wrap all this private information about them in the protective embrace of your love, and promise to be the one who can best help him or her deal with it. Some of these secrets may need correcting. Therefore, you can be an agent of healing and repair?not by lecturing, not by criticizing, but by listening in love and offering support. Some of these secrets just need to be accepted. They are part of this person’s make-up and history. And though these issues may not be very pleasant to deal with, they will always require a gentle touch.
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The Love Dare (Alex Kendrick)
– Highlight Loc. 953-55 | Added on Sunday, May 24, 2009, 07:13 AM

(Psalm 139:2?4). And yet God, who knows secrets about us that we even hide from ourselves, loves us at a depth we cannot begin to fathom. How much more should we?as imperfect people?reach out to our spouse in grace and understanding, accepting them for who they are and assuring them that their secrets are safe with us?
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The Love Dare (Alex Kendrick)
– Highlight Loc. 1689-90 | Added on Sunday, May 24, 2009, 07:15 AM

Even its boundaries and restrictions are God’s ways of keeping our sexual experiences at a level far beyond any of those advertised on television or in the movies.
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The Love Dare (Alex Kendrick)
– Highlight Loc. 1699-1701 | Added on Sunday, May 24, 2009, 07:16 AM

This same oneness is a hallmark of every marriage. In the act of romance, we join our hearts to each other in an expression of love that no other form of communication can match. That’s why “the marriage bed is to be undefiled” (Hebrews 13:4). We are not to share this same experience with anyone else.
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Journal Time:
What would you want your wife to know about you and sex and intimacy?
What are some ways that you can show your wife that you love her?
Is your marriage both physically and emotionally in line with Genesis 2:25 image of marriage? why or why not?  How can you make it that way?
Group Time:
Is marriage only good when you are ‘in love’?  Can we fall ‘in’ and ‘out’ of love? explain.
“…persuading the humans that a curious, and usually shortlived, experience which they call ‘being in love’ is the only respectable ground for marriage…”
How can we keep the ‘excitement permanent’?
“…that marriage can, and ought to, render this excitement permanent; and that a marriage which does not do so is no longer binding…”
Is marriage about happiness or holiness? explain.
“…Now comes the joke. The Enemy described a married couple as ‘one flesh’. He did not say ‘a happily married couple’ or ‘a couple who married because they were in love’, but you can make the humans ignore that….humans can be made to infer the false belief that the blend of affection, fear, and desire which they call ‘being in love’ is the only thing that makes marriage either happy or holy…”  (see 1 John 4:18)
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Men’s Group: Fellowship from Calvary Road, May 13, 2009

The progression of the chapters in Calvary Road is significant.  We started with brokenness, then went to confession/cleaning our lives (cups) up so we can fill them with the Holy Spirit, and now we turn to fellowship.

Years ago I kept secrets from my wife, and one day I finally ‘confessed’ and ‘cleaned’ out ALL the skeletons in my closet (cup).  It was a scary, crazy, and bold move that kept us up talking until 3am.  I was scared of her not forgiving me and not understanding me.  She did both.

Shortly after my cup was clean 2 things happened.  My marriage went from great to amazing.  The comfort in KNOWING that there was nothing to hide freed us up to have a depth and peace and intimacy that I would have never dreamed of.  

The second thing that happened is that I learned to share my dirty cup with other men.  I found several men who were willing and that I felt save enough with to share my deepest fears and struggles.  I talk and meet with these men weekly.  This has transformed my relationship with my wife, with Christ, and with everyone around me.  A very large weight has been lifted from my soul, and I have a place to run and hide when things get overwhelming.

Hession in chapter 3-The Way of Fellowship outlines the importance of fellowship in shaping our lives and our relationships with our spouses, our friends, and our God.

Through the years, I have continued to try and coach and encourage other men to ‘date’ each other.  There is a richness to life that is sorely lacking without this process.  But it takes men SO LONG and most NEVER are able or willing to get there.  

The only way to do it is by finding a guy that you feel comfortable with and you take a few baby steps by sharing some private struggles or sins.  See how they respond, If they respond in kind and with understanding then dig deeper and continue to share more.  As you trust more and learn to share more, you will find that your marriage is better, your walk with Christ is deeper, and your life is richer.

Any questions?

Calvary Road, Chapter 3, Fellowship quotes:

But if we have not been brought into vital fellowship with our brother, it is a proof that to that extent we have not been brought into vital fellowship with God
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Sin always involves us in being unreal, pretending, duplicity, window dressing, excusing ourselves and blaming others–and we can do all that as much by our silence as by saying or doing something.
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The only basis for real fellowship with God and man is to live out in the open with both.
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Spurgeon defines it in one of his sermons as “the willingness to know and be known.”
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We must be willing not only to know, but to be known by him for what we really are. That means we are not going to hide our inner selves from those with whom we ought to be in fellowship; we are not going to window dress and put on appearances; nor are we going to whitewash and excuse ourselves. We are going to be honest about ourselves with them. We are willing to give up our spiritual privacy, pocket our pride and risk our reputations for the sake of being open and transparent with our brethren in Christ.
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We have not necessarily got to tell everybody everything about ourselves. The fundamental thing is our attitude of walking in the light, rather than the act. Are we willing to be in the open with our brother–and be so in word when God tells us to?
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When the barriers are down and the masks are off, God has a chance of making us really one. But there is also the added joy of knowing that in such a fellowship we are “safe.”
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Jesus wants you to begin walking in the light with Him in a new way today. Join with one other–your Christian friend, the person you live with, your wife, your husband. Drop the mask.

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Married Life Live, Session 2: Only Jesus can heal wounds.

Enjoy the notes and the brief audio teaching from our second Married Life Live session.
MEN’s ANSWERS:
What is your wound?
  • performance wound
  • not enough wound
  • distand dad and/or mom
  • not sensitive (family of origin-distant-did not express feelings)
  • non-emotional-grow up afraid of emotions/expression of emotions
  • self sufficient wound (can do life on own)
How does your wife help that wound?
  • acts of service
  • words of affirmation
  • touch
  • quality time
  • gifts
What role does Jesus play in your marriage?
  • put Jesus first–then marriage will follow
  • let Him rule, submit to Him otherwise it doesn’t work
  • Jesus is the glue.
  • example of forgiveness & grace
  • unconditional
  • grow closer to Him by prayer, reading Bible, fellowship
WOMEN’S ANSWERS:
What is your wound?
  • avoid conflict
  • perfection
  • inadequate
  • feeling valued/desirable
  • not loved
  • lack confidence
  • favoritism/suppressed feelings
How does your husband hurt that wound?  
  • expectation
  • criticism: this is a BIG one.  It is NEVER worth it! You WILL NOT change him/her by criticism.
  • trying to fix a problem
  • feeling not valued or under valued and undesirable
How does your husband help that wound?
  • open and share
  • healthy disagreement
  • acceptance
  • speaking truth
  • gentleness
  • support/encoragement
  • perspective
What role does Jesus play in your marriage?
  • unconditional love
  • Jesus loves us/rejoices in us
*KEY is to identify the wounds/issue because that helps to heal, recognize when they pop up, and focus on Christ to heal them.  Spouse can’t fix/heal the wound, but we can minister to the wound as Jesus heals it.
*CRITICISM:  It is NEVER worth it! You WILL NOT change him/her by criticism. My wife used to try this–ex. ‘you really should…find some friends that would be good for you etc…only when she gave up the criticism and started to pray did I start to make some of the changes that she desired.  We have to remember that criticism is painful, counter productive, and never works to change us so DON’T DO IT.  Love him/her just the way they are!
*DON’T try and fix it…it is usually the husband who wants to ‘fix’ the problem but whoever it is DON’T do it.  LISTEN and only fix if asked to.
*AFFIRM, AFFIRM, AFFIRM: in all discussions/arguments, lead with affirmation and don’t stonewall or run away…meet the problem head on by talking and listening.  A woman who stonewalls or runs from conflict with a husband who is from a stoic or non-emotional upbringing is very hurtful.  A man from such a family of origin needs empathy and support not stonewalling.
*Allow Jesus to delight in YOU!
“…the LORD takes delight in his people…”-Psalm 149:4.
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Luke 18: The rich young ruler & all of His homes

Greg Boyd hits 2 homeruns in a row with these 2 sermons.  The first discusses that age old challenge of the rich young ruler who approaches Jesus and asks Him what must he do to inherit eternal life, and the second discusses Jesus’ comments later on in Luke 18 regarding who is your mother, brother etc….  Both are powerful and moving.

  • The die to stuff exercise at the end of the first is really revealing and powerful
  • The community of Christ teaching that can truly transform our communities throughout the second is inspiring and challenging.

As always share with us your comments.

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Saint Patrick: Why I now where green.

As a kid, I never wore green on St. Patrick’s day so I could go against the grain, but now as an adult, I try to wear green to honor this amazing man.

  • shipped from England to Ireland into slavery at age 16
  • escapes back to England only to RETURN to Ireland as a missionary
  • began his walk with Christ at age 40–yes it is NEVER too late
  • planted an estimated 800 churches in Ireland
  • one of the greatest evangelists of ALL time
In his own words: 
I bind to myself today
The strong virtue of the Invocation of the Trinity:
I believe the Trinity in the Unity
The Creator of the Universe.

I bind to myself today
The virtue of the Incarnation of Christ with His Baptism,
The virtue of His crucifixion with His burial,
The virtue of His Resurrection with His Ascension,
The virtue of His coming on the Judgement Day.

I bind to myself today
The virtue of the love of seraphim,
In the obedience of angels,
In the hope of resurrection unto reward,
In prayers of Patriarchs,
In predictions of Prophets,
In preaching of Apostles,
In faith of Confessors,
In purity of holy Virgins,
In deeds of righteous men.

I bind to myself today
The power of Heaven,
The light of the sun,
The brightness of the moon,
The splendour of fire,
The flashing of lightning,
The swiftness of wind,
The depth of sea,
The stability of earth,
The compactness of rocks.

I bind to myself today
God’s Power to guide me,
God’s Might to uphold me,
God’s Wisdom to teach me,
God’s Eye to watch over me,
God’s Ear to hear me,
God’s Word to give me speech,
God’s Hand to guide me,
God’s Way to lie before me,
God’s Shield to shelter me,
God’s Host to secure me,
Against the snares of demons,
Against the seductions of vices,
Against the lusts of nature,
Against everyone who meditates injury to me,
Whether far or near,
Whether few or with many.

I invoke today all these virtues
Against every hostile merciless power
Which may assail my body and my soul,
Against the incantations of false prophets,
Against the black laws of heathenism,
Against the false laws of heresy,
Against the deceits of idolatry,
Against the spells of women, and smiths, and druids,
Against every knowledge that binds the soul of man.

Christ, protect me today
Against every poison, against burning,
Against drowning, against death-wound,
That I may receive abundant reward.

Christ with me, Christ before me,
Christ behind me, Christ within me,
Christ beneath me, Christ above me,
Christ at my right, Christ at my left,
Christ in the fort,
Christ in the chariot seat,
Christ in the poop [deck],
Christ in the heart of everyone who thinks of me,
Christ in the mouth of everyone who speaks to me,
Christ in every eye that sees me,
Christ in every ear that hears me.

I bind to myself today
The strong virtue of an invocation of the Trinity,
I believe the Trinity in the Unity
The Creator of the Universe.

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What does it look like to be the Good Samaritan?

An AMAZING sermon by Pastor Bucky regarding the daring adventure to be a Good Samaritan, to be the hands and feet of Jesus to our world.  This is a POWERFUL sermon that I am confident you will enjoy.  At the end of his sermon there is an incredible testimony of what we can do if we lead with God’s grace and love EVEN when we can’t or don’t want to.