Tag Archives: Men on the Path

Posted on

Men on the Path, November 4, 2009: True Success

We were in session #3 from a quiet strength a men’s Bible study by Tony Dungy and our question for today is: How is God’s definition of success different from how most people define it?
We looked at five key verses: Psalm 1:1-3; one Samuel 16:7; Micah 6: 6-8; Matthew 22:34-40; acts 1:8; Philippians 1: 21

God’s definition of success is “to live is Christ to die is gain” only when we can die to ourselves can we truly be successful. J. C. Ryle in his book titled Holiness points out what it costs to be a true Christian (to gain true success).

“For one thing, it will cost us our self righteousness. We must cast away all pride and high thoughts and conceit of our own goodness… for another thing it will cost us our sins. We must be willing to give up every habit and practice which is wrong in God’s sight. We and our sin must quarrel, if we and God are to be friends….For another thing, it will cost us our love of ease…we secretly wish we could have a vicarious Christianity, and could be good by proxy, and have everything done for us. Anything that requires exertion and labor is entirely against the grain of our hearts… in the last place, it will cost us the favor of the world… surely a Christian should be willing to give up anything which stands between him and heaven…A religion that costs nothing is worth nothing! A cheap Christianity, without a cross, will prove in the end a useless Christianity, without a crown…”-pg 82-86

“We must seek to have personal intimacy with the Lord Jesus, and to deal with him as a man deals with a loving friend. We must realize what it is to turn to him first in every need, to talk to him about every difficulty, to consult him about every step, to spread before him all our sorrows, to get him to share in our all our joys, to do all as in his site, and to go through every day leaning on and looking to him.”-pg 113

Posted on

Guy’s Night Out: Mobster’s Story

Monte has invited all men who can make it to a Mariners Church event:

Gentlemen,
We have been invited to participate with a special Mariners Church event on Sunday evening, the 13th of September.
This is what the event is about….Guys, you won’t want to miss this BBQ dinner from Newport Rib Company and music by three-time Grammy Award winner, Brent Lamb!

After dinner, you’ll hear the unbelievable story of former mobster, Michael Franzese – a story of hope and redemption. You may have heard him before and now your friends need to hear Michael’s story as he paints a picture of his former life and his life today.

Cost: $20pp or $150 for a table of 8.
Please let me know who is interested and we will coordinate. I know I am going, and I believe Pastor Bucky is as well.
Pastor Monte
Posted on

How simple is the Christian walk of faith?

Here is a marvelous quote from 2 Christian missionaries who live in Africa about the Christian walk.

“Loving God with all your heart, mind, soul and strength will take you to the end of yourself, and you will find yourself looking out over a precipice. Only God can keep you from falling. Only faith working through love counts. Let’s never leave the simplicity and purity of devotion to Jesus. All we know when the pressure becomes great is Jesus and Him crucified. We exist by the power of the Cross, safe and secure.”-Rolland and Heidi

Posted on

Men’s Group: May 6, 2009 Filling the Cup

We discussed chapter 2 of Calvary Road today.  It discusses the importance of brokenness and confession in our lives so that we are willing and ready to be filled by the Holy Spirit to ‘spill out’ the spirit of God onto others around us.  The exercise of brokenness and confession helps for us to get out of the way so God can drive/lead.  

Francisco shared what “personal and daily revival” means to him:

“Jesus is waiting for me when I get up.”  

What would the world be like if followers of Jesus lived like this?  Imagine if you lived a life of anticipation and joy knowing that as soon as you opened your eyes every morning, Jesus was there smiling and waiting for you!  Take away the worry and anxiety and all the stuff packed into our minds, and start each day as an adventure with Jesus.

Quotes from Calvary Road:

“Revival itself is being absolutely filled to overflowing with the Holy Spirit, and that is victorious living.”

“If we were asked this moment if we were filled with the Holy Spirit, how many of us would dare to answer “yes”? Revival is when we can say “yes” at any moment of the day.”

“People imagine that dying to self makes one miserable. But it just the opposite. It is the refusal to die to self that makes one miserable. The more we know of death with Him, the more we shall know of His life in us, and so the more of real peace and joy.”
Posted on

Men’s Group: April 29, 2009 Brokenness, Calvary Road

I discovered during last Wednesday’s Men of the Path that Drew is not the only expert on the book, Calvary Road.  Our Pastoral Care Minister, Monty Pries, taught on Chapter One, which is titled, “Brokenness.”  Monty hooks you right away with saying, “This book begins with brokenness, but we don’t.  We begin with pride/ego; we want to accomplish our will, not God’s will for us.”  Coming from the East Coast I can totally relate.  See, in the good old NE, Frank Sinatra is still king in many people’s eyes.  It is amazing how many times you will hear the song, “I Did It My Way” proudly sung.  Many of us know, however, that Frank eliminated the part that says, “Yeah, and look where it got me.”  Which brings me to Monty’s second point; there are two types of brokenness.  One is voluntary, where you choose humility on your own, and the second is involuntary.  Involuntary is where God chooses humility for you; He puts you in the refiner’s fire, and does a very thorough job of it.  Of course, many of you know I waited for God to refine me as I was too busy doing it “my way.”  For those of you that don’t know, “my way” landed me in the best place to not only find God but learn submission – prison.   If you go to www.uberlumen.com, you can hear my testimony, and find a lot of other great stuff. 

We had some great discussion around the tables.  Our table opened with a few words about revival.  A revival is an individual process that takes place in your heart.  It does not have to be the big event we usually imagine when the word revival is mentioned.  We talked about the four desires of the unbroken heart; unyielding, seeking one’s own glory, standing up for one’s own rights and justifying oneself.   {A question – do you need all four to have an unbroken heart?  Please go to uberlumen and ask Drew to post your answer. }  If you have been in a place of brokenness you know what it means to cry out to God, and you also know that if you were sincere in your plea, God got you through it.  Hession puts it this way in his book; “pride at last bows its head to God’s will, admits its wrong, gives up its own way to Jesus, surrenders it rights and discards its own glory-that the Lord Jesus might have all and be all.  In other words, it is dying to self and self attitudes.”  Can you think of a situation where this happened in your life (or is happening now)?  Did you yield to God and His desire to correct your path, or did you exercise your free will and stiffen your neck and refuse to repent?  On thing about dying to self – it is a constant process – every day, several times per day. Bucky sat at our table and asked, “What are you doing each day as a reminder of dying to yourself?”

I will end with one last question for those who could not attend.  Monty talked about the retreat he was on last weekend.  During that time he spoke about entering through a “monk’s door.”  With using any search engines, can you tell me what a monk’s door is and what it’s purpose is?  I’d love to hear from you.

See you next Wednesday morning at the Northpark clubhouse.  This is an EXCELLENT series; please don’t miss it.   Even if you went through it at Mariner’s; we are a different group of people.  You never know what you may learn, or how God will use your knowledge to help someone else.  Remember, EVERY encounter you have with someone either gives life or drains life.  Which do you usually do?

Dave
Posted on

Men’s Group: March 18, 2009 A response to creation: WORSHIP

Here is a GREAT summary from Dave (and the study questions are below as well):

Our “ice breaker” question last Wednesday, was, “Talk about a beautiful place you have visited or would like to visit.”  I cannot say what was discussed at the other tables but there were some great answers at the table where I sat.  Most of us, including me, mentioned great works of God like the Grand Canyon and the Great Lakes.  But a couple of guys spoke of simpler things.  One was the view while sitting on his screened in porch as a child.  The other was watching a farmer till his land and taking in the smells of the earth as it was being turned over.  Simpler is certainly better, isn’t it?  Close your eyes and think of a simpler time in your life and take in it’s beauty.Bucky covered Psalm 139; please take a few minutes and read the Psalm.  What does this Psalm say to you? Here is a quick synopsis of what Psalm 139 says to Bucky.  Verses 1-6 say God knows us intimately.  Verses 7-12 say God is with us constantly. Verses 13-18 say God made us wonderfully, and verses 19-24 say God judges righteously.  So, if David, knew these things about God, how did it effect his relationship with Him?  If you are familiar with David’s life, you know he was far from perfect.  But the Bible tells us David was a man after God’s own heart.  How can that be?  Well, in looking at the verses of Psalm 139 and how Bucky broke them down it is easy to see what David’s reaction was to each.  Since God knows us intimately, David knew we must TRUST God.  It makes sense, doesn’t it.  If someone knows all about you shouldn’t you be able to trust them?  If God is with us constantly, David knew we must ACKNOWLEDGE Him.  It is amazing how David said that no matter where he went he knew God was there.  God is everywhere.  Since God is always with us shouldn’t we acknowledge His presence and act accordingly?  I think it is funny that some people believe they can get away with something because, “no one is looking.”  How untrue.  God knows everything you think, say and do.  So, when you sin, rather than shy away from God, do what David did; acknowledge Him and repent.  You will feel better faster if you get on your knees and say you are sorry.  Ask God to help you overcome your areas of weakness.  Pete McKenzie says the real turning point in his spiritual life came when he got on his knees and said, “Lord, I am a failure at being a Christian.  Would You help me become the man You want me to be?   Well, I’d say God heard Pete and helped him get to his goal.  Since God made us wonderfully, David knew we must PRAISE God.  We’ve heard it before; God has a purpose for our lives.  We have been given talents and spiritual gifts and must use them both for God, not our own personal gain.   Many of us struggle with this one.  We, as men, find our identity in our work.  We justify why we need to put in 12 hours a day.  I would like you to take a piece of paper and write down the five things that are most important to you.  Then, HONESTLY put down how much time each day you spend on those five things.  This will tell you what is really most important in your life.  Lastly, since God judges righteously, David knew we must FOLLOW God, not try and be Him.  In other words, it is not up to us to judge or take matters into our own hands.  Judgment is reserved for God and God alone.  This is my biggest challenge.  I have a tendency to judge rather than listen with an open mind.   Every Wednesday we end with, “How can we pray for you?”  Well, if you are a man of prayer, my request is you pray for me and my judgmental attitude.  Have a great week; I encourage you to spend some time with God and reflect on the blessings He’s given you.

Please enjoy the study questions from our latest men’s group, and as always, please share your thoughts.

Talk about a beautiful place that you have visited or would like to visit?

Psalm 139-I Must Worship

 1 O LORD, you have searched me and you know me. 2 You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar.  3 You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways.4 Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O LORD. 5 You hem me in—behind and before;
you have laid your hand upon me.6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,  too lofty for me to attain.7 Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence?8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. 9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, 10 even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast.11 If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,”  12 even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you.13 For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.15 My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, 16 your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.17 How precious to me are your thoughts, O God!  How vast is the sum of them! 18 Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand. When I awake, I am still with you. 19 If only you would slay the wicked, O God! Away from me, you bloodthirsty men! 20 They speak of you with evil intent; your adversaries misuse your name. 21 Do I not hate those who hate you, O LORD, and abhor those who rise up against you?  22 I have nothing but hatred for them; I count them my enemies. 23 Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.24 See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. 

God knows us intimately—I must_____________him-vv.1-6

God is with me constantly—I must _____________him-vv.7-12

God made me wonderfully—I must____________him-vv.13-18

God judges righteously—I must _______________him—vv.19-24

Questions for Discussion:

1.  What are some of the ways that you see and experience God in this life?

2. How does David’s knowledge of who God is affect his daily life?

3.How is God calling you to live a life of Intimate worship

                -Trust

                -Acknowledge

                -Praise

                -Follow

4. How can we pray for you?

 

 

Posted on

Married Life Live Session #1, March 6, 2009 SUMMARY

Enjoy the audio summary of our teaching and here are your answers:
Ways the women feel loved:

  • affirmation–positive comments, gratitude
  • phone calls during the day
  • listen (turn-off TV, electronics) and listen without solving the problem
  • maintain peace if ‘mom’ is feeling upset
  • no selective hearing
  • pray together
  • affection (non-sexual)–hand holding, kissing, etc.
  • committment to purity (ex. victoria secret commercial, movies-selective etc.)
  • empathy
  • relifef with kids & house chores
  • balanced parenting (teamwork)
  • listening and following through (ex. listening to a book that was mentioned and then buying it for us)
  • date night (planning it from start to finish–including setting up a babysitter)
  • respecting in-laws and boundaries with in-laws
  • family and couple time as a priority
Ways men feel respected:
  • affirm us without asking (“you are my hero.”)
  • give us grace, forgive and forget–don’t bring up the past and don’t use the past against us
  • support our passions/hobbies & learn to enjoy our activities
  • understand our stress
  • speak with softer tones in your voice and without nagging
  • speak highly of us with your friends
  • trust our decisions
  • allign and stand behind us when we are parenting our kids
  • give us down time…respect our space
  • (am I forgetting anything?) the men did mention that the top 3 ways that they feel respect is: #1 SEX. #2 SEX. #3 SEX.

Please share with us your comments & feedback.

Posted on

Men’s Group Psalm 145, February 4, 2009

Message from Dave from Men on the Path last week:

Sometimes God speaks to you subtly and other times He makes it obvious because He doesn’t want you to miss it.  Sometimes it takes me a while to write these summaries because either I am not listening for God’s voice or He is being subtle and I just don’t realize it.  Anyway, between Wednesday and this morning (Friday) God made it easy for me. I am attempting double duty this year.  In addition to journaling by writing my letter to God each evening, last month I purchased a Daily Devotional where I read a passage of scripture and then it gives a few words as if they are being spoken by God.  I do not know what to make of that yet.   I am pretty rigid when to comes to religion and politics.  I am working on it but I am not there by any means.  I am sure I can find arguments for both sides; those that say it is okay and those that say it is blasphemy.  In any event, I believe my answer came in the last few days and the answer is quite interesting.   But before we get to that…

On Wednesday Robbie lead the Men of the Path session.  We read Psalm 145 (please take some time and read it before going further – it will help –  wish I could put the Final Jeopardy Theme in here so you could hear that music in the background as we pause 🙂  So now you know what we talked about, praising God.  Psalm 145 is a song of praise; yes, praise, and lots of it.  When you read that Psalm look at all of the words David uses for praising his Lord – great, mighty, majesty, power, awesome, righteous, good, compassion, and the list goes on.  David certainly knew who his Lord and Savior was, didn’t he?  How could David pour out such praise?  Well, think of it this way; you cannot praise someone if you don’t have a relationship with them, can you?  So that is where the praise begins, on your knees, spending alone time with Him and listening for His voice.  It begins by acknowledging God for who He is and realizing it is about Him and not you.  You must believe that God is a sovereign God and that God is good.  You must submit to the fact that God knows best and that God’s word is the final authority in your life.  We know from reading and journaling the Psalms during January that David knew these things.  Believe me, it is one thing to write those words and another thing to live by them.   I like what Jan Gilbert said at our table on Wednesday morning; “It is difficult for me to praise God in the bad times.  For instance when I get a flat tire on the way to work, do I say “Yes, thank You, God?”  No, I do not.  Or, I may say it, but do I really mean it? No, probably not”  Jan was being realistic, wasn’t he?  Then Jan gave us another story about when God delayed a family travel plan.  The outcome was amazing.  I encourage you to ask Jan about it when you see him.

Okay, back to the devotional.  Here are the “God speaking” parts from the last two days:

“Do not resist Me or harden your heart.  I take no pleasure in the affliction of My children.  In love, I chasten to prevent the deeper suffering involved should I allow you to go on in a path of evil.  But My heart is glad when you walk close, with your hand in Mine, and we talk over the day’s journey and activities so it becomes a happy way that we travel in mutual fellowship.  So, pour out your praise to Me from a light heart and I will plan your path and we will go singing.”

“Praise Me.  Lift your heart in gratitude.  In your sleeping and your waking hours, My hand of protection and blessing is upon you.  I have built a hedge around you.  Even as was written concerning Job.  It was not a false accusation of the devil to Job.  I removed it to silence the enemy of his soul.  But for the multitudes I have never removed the hedge.  I am keeping you, My child for one purpose in particular – that you may be able to accomplish the task committed to you.”

Amazing, isn’t it?  Out of the 365 days and writings in that devotional; those writings come now.  There are no coincidences, are there?  It is clear to me; Praise Him, in good times and in bad.  Having the abundant life means you are at peace during trials and tribulations.  Remember, if there is anyone we can pray for (including you), Pathways has a great prayer team.  Contact Armando Barrios atbrisamar999@yahoo.com.

Posted on

Men’s Group: February 25, 2009 (Matthew 18:21-35)

Here is another great summary of Men’s Group by Dave:

This past Wednesday we studied the Parable of the Unmerciful Servant (Matthew 18:21-35) and how it relates to forgiveness.  Please take a few minutes and read the passage.  I suggest you do it when you have some quiet time because you will get more out of it if you can meditate on the scripture and write in a journal what God says to you about it.   Robby taught on this lesson and he presented a very good question to us; why do we often think about forgiveness as being about the person that needs to be forgiven rather than the person doing the forgiving?  Have you ever thought if you are in a position to forgive that it is about you, not the person you need to forgive?  Cynthia and I used to facilitate a nationally recognized Christ centered divorce recovery program called DivorceCare (www.divorcecare.org).  It is an incredible program.  If you know of anyone who is divorced and they haven’t been through a program PLEASE tell them about DivorceCare.  It does not matter how long they’ve been divorced; it will be the best advice you’ve ever given them.  Encourage them to attend.  Anyway, what I am leading into here is that there was an entire session spent on forgiveness.  This lesson leads off with the statement; “It’s not what you eat, but what is eating you that will kill you.”  How true; if we don’t find it in our hearts to truly forgive, we will harbor bitterness.  That bitterness will come out at some point; most likely against someone we love and care for, someone who did nothing to hurt us.  One thing to remember when talking about forgiveness; forgiveness is not reconciliation.  It is not condoning a behavior and saying it is okay.  Forgiveness is letting go, or setting down a load and not picking it up again.  Reconciliation is restoring a relationship.  You can forgive without condoning or reconciling.  Forgiveness is a decision, not a feeling.  We may not feel like forgiving but we can and should decide to forgive.  One last thing from that DivorceCare lesson; don’t expect or wait for an apology to forgive.  In other words, don’t try to assume control by saying the person must answer to YOU.  No, they must answer to GOD.

Now, back to our Wednesday discussion.  Two lines really got to me in this parable.  They were verses 29-30. Go back and read them. Can you imagine being the guy on your knees begging for forgiveness and the other “person” in the parable is God and He is telling you, “No, you are not forgiven?”  Where would you be?   

I asked a question in the beginning of this email about forgiving being more important to the person forgiving than the person in need of forgiveness.  Forgiveness produces several great benefits for the forgiver.  One is freedom.  Forgiving gives the forgiver the freedom to move on.  It is very healing because the situation no longer has power over the “wronged” person.  If you are in a position to forgive and don’t, you could end up depressed, bitter and/or angry.  All of those will eventually result in loneliness.  Who wants to be around a person like that?  Forgiveness produces healthier relationships.  And, remember what Jesus told us in Matthew 6:14-15; “For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.  But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.”  That is a pretty frightening statement, isn’t it?  It is right there is black and white (or red in some bibles).  I mean what happens if God doesn’t forgive you?  Where do you end up?

Bruce Peotter said something I believe is a very helpful tip for those of you who are married.  Each night before he and Kelly go to sleep, they talk about whether or not either of them said anything that hurt the other person and need to ask forgiveness for.  Think about it.  Rather than “addressing” the issue right then and there, which will almost always result in a heated conflict, you know you can save the situation for later when things have calmed down and talk about it rationally.  Just knowing you have that in your back pocket can keep the person who was “wronged” in a better frame of mind.  I think it is a great idea, don’t you?

How does one forgive?  Well Francisco said that one best.  You must first receive God’s forgiveness before you can truly forgive.  Then, rather than struggling with it yourself; turn the matter over to God.  Try something like, “Lord, make me willing to be willing to forgive because I am not there yet.”  That will really set your heart on the right path.  Some folks never really address their wrongs.  They say over time they forget about it, that time heals all wounds.  Well, from co-facilitating DivorceCare for almost two years I can honestly say, “Time does not heal all wounds.  It covers them.  Only Jesus can truly heal.

Well, I guess I made up for last week’s short email.  Thank you for taking the time to read this.  May God bless you and keep you.

Dave

Posted on

Men’s Topic #12: The Christmas Story

Hello Everyone,

Before I forget, last Wednesday, was our final meeting of the year; our next meeting will be on Wednesday, January 7, 2009. 

Bucky gave us the alternative Christmas story and Drew challenged us to read it this year rather than the one from Luke.   That “story” is the Gospel of John, chapter 1, verses 1-14.  I personally never looked at these verses in this way before.  Take a few minutes to read the material, then answer the first question we had; what is unique about the way John tells the Christmas story? 

 

I learn so much through Bucky’s teaching and our sharing time it is difficult for me to write about one or two things we covered.  I want to write about all of them; but I cannot.  In verse 10 it says, “He was in the world, and though the world was made through him, the world did not recognize him.”  Think about it, even today, there are people putting up lights and playing Christmas songs but they do not know why; they still do not recognize Him.  How can we help those around us see Jesus?  Doesn’t your heart go out to them?  This is a time when families will gather together.  Most every family has at least one non-believer. Maybe this will be the year YOU can be the light that turns away their darkness.  Maybe your testimony as to why you celebrate the birth of Christ will be the one that wins them over (remember, you are the plan).  I met with Bucky on Wednesday afternoon.  One reason was because I have certain family members I want dearly to come to know Christ.  Bucky suggested I share why I celebrate Christmas.   I pray this will be the time.  I also know I cannot force any truth on them; remember; grace opens the door to truth.  It is God’s timing, not mine.  I must give up control and place my faith and trust in Him in every aspect of my life. 

Patrick gave a great analogy on Wednesday comparing our salvation to a boy opening a present.  I encourage you to ask him about it.  Patrick, maybe you could record it for Uberlumen.  There was one other thing Patrick said that wowed me; “can you imagine going through today, just today, without forgiveness?”  Wow, incredible, huh?  Thank you, Patrick.

Since it is Christmas, I know what you can get yourself.  If you don’t already have one, get yourself a mentor.  Start the New Year by meeting with someone who knows more than you and absorb it like a sponge.  If you aren’t sure who can be your mentor, ask Bucky or any one of the elders.  They will be glad to help or suggest someone for you.

Have a blessed time celebrating the birth of Christ.

 

In His Service,
Dave
Posted on

Men’s Topic #9: Thankfulness

“If anyone would tell you the shortest, surest way to all happiness and all perfection, he must tell you to make a rule to yourself to thank and praise God for everything that happens to you…it is certain that whatever seeming calamity happens to you, if you thank and praise God for it you turn it into a blessing…it heals and turns all that it touches into happiness….every day….be made a day of thanksgiving…”-William Law

 

“We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures.”~Thornton Wilder

“The Pilgrims made seven times more graves than huts.  No Americans have been more impoverished than these who, nevertheless, set aside a day of thanksgiving.”~H.U. Westermayer

Thankfulness is a state of our hearts.  Practicing the state of thankfulness for EVERYTHING develops in us a heart for others and for God.  Smile and embrace those around you on this day of thanks!

Posted on

Men’s Topic #8: Superhero’s

I had an ‘aha’ moment several weeks ago.  Most of the successful men that I know are superheros.  Yes men of steel.  These men are able to detach in a moment’s notice, disengage from wives and family, and ‘puff up’ and plow through any situation.

These men come from wounded back grounds.  Family of origin nightmares.  A distant father and an overbearing mother.  At least one of their parents is inevitably an alcoholic or worse.  At a VERY early age these men hide behind perfection.  When the drunk mom and the distant dad become too much, they amp up and shut off ANY emotions from the outside world and OVER achieve, over and over again.

Over and over again, I hear the same story–abandoned by dad and living with a crazy mom who must spend all her energy raising the prodigal younger brother so the eldest son emerges to save the day: captain of the football, track, AND wrestling team….and did I mention validictorian?  abandoned by a distant dad and living with a drunk mom too spent to supervise the youngest and last kid in the house so this son rises up to MVP of the water polo team, etc.  SAME story different details!

When these men grow up it is no surprise that they live Thoreau’s ‘quiet lives of desperation’ sealed off from any emotions from any chance of intimacy and deep meaningful relationships.

I was amazed by listening to the author of “The Shack” (a MUST read) who described himselft as just such a man hiding his baggage-his “shack”, as he called it, behind him while he hid his true brokenness from the world by perfectionism.

Please enjoy this presentation regarding so many men’s hidden secret: They are superhero’s.

Posted on

Spiritual Secret

The famous missionary to inland China wrote a book titled: Hudson Taylor’s Spiritual Secret.

Hudson Taylor had a difficult and amazing life.  At one point in his life, he had become very depressed, even contemplating suicide due to so many frustrations in the mission field of China.  He shared his frustrations and concerns with a friend who wrote to him in 1869 the words that forever transformed Hudson Taylor.  Here are the words that describe Hudson Taylor’s spiritual ‘secret’:

“I seem as if the first glimmers of the dawn of a glorious day has risen upon me…I seem to have supped only that which can fully satisfy…To let my loving Saviour work in me His will…abiding, not striving or struggling; looking off unto Him; trusting Him for present power…resting in the love of an almighty Saviour in the joy of a complete salvation…Not striving to have faith, or to increase my faith but a looking at the faithful one seems all we need.  A resting in the Loved One entirely, for time, for eternity.  It does not appear to me as anything new, only formerly misunderstood.”-John McCarthy

Hudson Taylor had found his spiritual secret.  It was the exchanged life–no longer I but Christ living in me.The One Year Christian History devotional, pg 497

“I have been crucified with Christ.  I myself no longer live, but Christ lives in me.  So I live my life in this earthly body by trusting in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.”-Galatians 2:19-20

Posted on

Men’s Topic #7: TRUST in Him

Here is a GREAT summary from Dave about Men on the Path:

Let me start by saying I really miss seeing some of you guys on Wednesday mornings.

Bucky always gives us a little information about the culture of the time so we can better understand the meaning of the scripture verses we talk about. One part of his explanation really got my attention. Bucky explained how, in Jesus’ time, a man proposed to a woman by offering her a cup. If she drank from the cup, it meant she accepted, the engagement began and the man would then go home to build a room onto his father’s house. It made me think, so how did we go from offering a cup to a mandatory three carats? Why does a woman need such a big, bright, shiny object, and, why do we feel the need to give it to her?

Last Wednesday we discussed the first six verses of John 14, which starts with, “Do not let your hearts be troubled; Trust in God; trust also in me,” and ends with, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes through the Father except through me.” How do Jesus’ words bring comfort to your heart as you read and reflect on them? Think about it for a few minutes. For some on Wednesday, going to heaven meant seeing loved ones again while others talked about true freedom from worries and fears, and about seeing God’s face.

These verses are great messages for us as we live in Orange County – an area where so many are hearts are troubled because of their trust in the things of this world (i.e. the real estate and the stock markets). This is southern California, right? Aren’t we supposed to be “the place” where everyone wants to live so housing values should never decline? And the stock market; when is the last time it went spiraling downward like this? If we cannot trust in our real estate and stock markets then what can we trust in? Well, we can trust in God’s promise He has a plan for us that is bigger than anything this world has to offer. He has prepared a place for us in heaven. All we need to do is be born again; become a new creation. In reading, “My Utmost for His Highest,” this morning it said we are not born again and our souls are not saved unless our hearts no longer desire the things of the past. Quite a different approach than, pray a prayer and go to heaven. Personally, I choose to believe Oswald Chambers. When you believe in your heart, change will come and fears will subside. When God looks down is He able to tell the difference between your lifestyle and the non-believer’s? Maybe we should go back to offering cups.

In His Service,
Dave

Posted on

Men’s Topic #6: Love the one you’re with

Our topic this week was about LOVING your spouse.  In our OC world everyone is looking for more, coveting, and thinking that ‘the grass is always greener’.   If you want a GREAT marriage, you have to stop looking at the other lawns and stop and water your own grass! i.e. a GREAT marriage takes SACRIFICE and HARD WORK and COMMITTMENT to LOVE her with CHRIST’S LOVE!

Our Scripture for this week is: Ephesians 5:25-33

Here is Dave’s summary email:

I want to thank Robby for being a man of courage; it isn’t easy getting up in front of a bunch of men when you are the youngest and possibly the least experienced in the group regarding the topic you were speaking on. Robby spoke on Ephesians 5:25-33. If you haven’t read it in a while please do so. It offers great marital advice. Robby told us how he sees love – as an action word, not a feeling. Love, Robby said, is not about us but about other people. Verse 25 states, “Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” Then, smack dab in the middle of those verses is the line, “He who loves his wife loves himself.” Wow, pretty powerful, huh?

Some things that went around the room during our discussion time were:

– Love has nothing to do with the physical and everything to do with the heart

– Jesus is our love coach

– Marriages get neglected in the name of material success

– Show love by praying with and for one another; you cannot be angry with someone if you are praying with/for them

– Know your spouse’s “love language,” whether it is gifts, affirmation, physical touch, time or service (from Gary Chapman’s book, The Five Love Languages)

– Spend some quality, uninterruptible time on the couch with your spouse when you first get home from work (“couch time”)

– Get rid of your television and your children’s cell phones

– If together, we can keep our eyes focused on Jesus rather than the imperfect human beings we are, and ask Him to love our spouse through us, we will grow closer to Him and to our spouse – as you both grow closer to Christ you grow closer to each other….

As always, please share your thoughts/comments with us!
Posted on

Men’s Topic #2: Are you enough?

Topic #2 is based on the story of the prodigal son from Luke 15.  This brief audio is about a LIFE CHANGING concept that will improve your marriage and relationships.  We are all walking around with the ‘I am not enough’ wound that society and our parents have given us.  This wound can only truly be healed by God, but our wives/s.o./friends can help heal this wound.  Please add your thoughts, questions, and comments below this post!

 

Posted on

Men’s Topic #1: Where is your treasure?

Here is a GREAT email from Dave summarizing Men’s Topic #1 (and I have added 2 audio’s–Bucky’s teaching points and the debrief insights time): Where is your treasure?

The passages from Matthew that we talked about Wednesday are among my all time favorites. (For those unable to attend we covered Matthew 6: 19-34. You may wish to take a moment and read it before going further.)

Bucky covered so much this morning as he talked about Jesus’ Life Investment Strategy:

  1. One of the key words in these passages is “treasure.”  When we hear that word most of us think in terms of physical things – material possessions; but Jesus meant it as the order of the heart.
  2. We all have a treasure box – our hearts. What do you have in your treasure box? (“For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”)
  3. We tend to organize our lives around our investment strategy. We need to organize it around God’s Kingdom and all else will follow. (“Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all of these things will be given to you as well.”)
  4. It is impossible to treasure two things equally. We cannot have one foot in the world and one foot in the Kingdom. It does not work; one will eventually dominate. (“There shall be no other gods before me.”)
  5. The treasure isn’t something we get when we die (like some prize); it is here and now. The Book of Matthew is the Gospel of the Kingdom and it tells us the Kingdom of Heaven is here and now. We can have the eternal, abundant life today. Something Cynthia and I do each morning is pray together and one of the prayers we use is the one Dr. Bill G. gave us a few months back.  Ask Bill or me if you’d like a copy.

So, what does God treasure? He treasures people, relationships and the creative order of things. As you re-read these passages look for how God tells us about how He takes care of all things that honor Him. Don’t be afraid to take that step. Tell God you want to turn your life over to Him (“thy will be done”). “You will find rest for your soul.”

Posted on

Men on the Path: September 24

I hope to have a weekly summary post (hopefully with some audio) of our time together at our men’s group. I missed yesterday, but Dave has sent me a great summary! (Don’t forget to go to uberlumen.com and sign up for the updates by email and itunes podcasting):

As soon as I saw the scripture reading for the Men of the Path was about Peter walking on water (when Peter temporarily trusted in God and forgot about his fears) it reminded me of the John Ortberg book, “If You Want to Walk on Water, You Have to Get Out of the Boat.” What a title, huh? If you haven’t read the book, I highly recommend it. Bucky took that passage on fear and turned it into a positive by leading us into a discussion about risk. As one member at our table so aptly put it, you have to be willing to give something up when you take a risk. Getting to know God personally, enjoying His presence here and now is a risk. Most of us are afraid of what God might do. Another person at our table reminded us that everything we have (career, family, etc.) belongs to God. God wants us to have those things (not to excess) but also know He can take it at anytime. So we are to worship and honor Him first; everything else (yes, even that thing that just crossed your mind) is secondary. So, how do you spend your day, your week? What are your priorities in life? Write down your schedule for a typical week. What are you willing to give up for God?

In His Service,

Dave